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HOME AGAIN. Which means I have about 1/4 of my wardrobe with me at present, because that’s as much as will fit in my admittedly LARGE AND IN CHARGE L.L. Bean suitcase… Speaking of which, they REALLY need to make the aisles larger on those Amtrak trains! I can barely lug my suitcase down to get a seat, let alone lift it to the overhead compartment, but then somehow there always seems to be an altruistic, strapping young man present to help out a damsel in distress (or at least, a lazy damsel—I know, I know, for shame! I know)…
And it’s friggin’ cold.
Hence the need for creative layering. Ie, a boys undershirt worn under a belted strapless dress with tights, a scarf, a leather jacket. Of which I was quite proud, because it reminded me of an editorial Gemma Ward did for Teen Vogue way back in the day (2006, to be exact) that I found really inspiring at the time, in which she wore plain tees under a gorgeous dresses. Did you like that little journey back into the teeny-bopper archives? Thank you, thank you very much. I’ll be here til Thursday.
So anyways, yesterday I metaphorically dragged my feet to the Verizon store the next town over to pick up an HD cable box for our new TV and so I’m waiting in line like a good little cookie when finally the tech guy is like, Hi, can I help you, what’s the name on the account. So I give my mum’s name, Brenda, and like whatever, the guy’s doing his thing, etc etc, except the whole time he’s giving me this creepy eye and I’m like WOAH buddy, that’s not even legal. So then he’s like, So sweetie, if you can just sign right here… and I’m like, No, no, you misheard—my name isn’t Sweetie. It’s Brenda. BAM.
The irony is that of course my name’s not actually Brenda at all… But whatever. Certain measures must be taken. And just now I’m realizing the apparent contradiction between playing helpless in order to get other people to lift my luggage and shutting down the pervy guy with the wandering eyes at Verizon and I’m aware some of you will be like THAT’S SO HYPOCRITICAL… But it’s not the same, people. Not the same at all.