Like The River - JamesVincent McMorrow.
Something very dear to me is this badge. My best friend (at the time), Sasha, gave it to me. She bought this cardigan and along with it came this badge, she hated it for some reason - but i absolutely loved it and still do. She didn't give it to me because i liked it, she just gave it to me as if she was giving me her trash. It's like that saying, 'one man's trash is another man's treasure'. I pinned it to my bag and walked around Cape Town (where we were 'cause it was our holiday) happily. Sasha and i aren't much of friends now, she has neww friends ever since she's moved from my school to a more self-taught teaching method based at her home by...herself. Nevertheless, she has new friend now which is guess is rather sad because it feels as if i have none. She used to be the girl i could go out to a club with and she'd protect me from the douche bags who would occasionally call me faggot. Now, when i go out to a club, i get called faggot and no one is there to stand-up for me. That's why i rarely go to clubs nowdays - and to think i have to stay in this country for another fucking year.
I don't know how weird this may sound but i feel as if this badge is what i have left of Sasha, like our friendship is represented by this badge - 'cause i know she still cared about me. I can feel this badge, though, getting worn out and blunt. I keep on loosing it and misplacing it and i ahte looking for it, craving that girl i used to call my 'bestfriend'. I love her with my whole heart, she did change me but now that she's not here with me...i'm not sure how i am coping without her by my side. When i do see her, it's as if we're strangers getting introduced to each other. We have an awkward conversation, she tells me that she's sorry because she can't concentrate. I get offened, but i smile instead and tell that it's ok. Nearing the end, her friend would appear out of nowhere and would take her off some place and i would walk home on my lonesome. Teenage years are indeed the most lonely. I don't mind it now, though, i love feeling independant.
This song i downloaded some day, i don't know how i found out about him but he's amazing. He's one of my friends, well...not really but one day :)
One thing i know for sure though is taht you guys are my friends and i love you all.