I'm tired of girls making costumes sexy that are not. Wearing lingerie and a themed hat does not cut it. Also, a police officer wears pants, thank you very much. "Sexy" costumes are not only missing vital items of clothing, but they also just seem to lack the creativity and effort of their counterparts. So as much as I complain about this issue every year, I decided to just spill my guts, figuratively and literally this time. It was between this, and a sexy turd. Or a sexy girl on her period. The fact that this makes me look naked was great, because dudes were in for a horrible surprise once I turned around. I had a blast dancing in this, and humping sexy kittens with my gushing innards.

I picked up a nude body suit and tights from American Apparel, and some fake intestines and a jug of blood from a costume shop. I sewed an uneven line down a leg of the tights, cut off the excess, turned it inside out, stuffed it with muslin fabric, and soaked it in fake blood. I also strategically drenched myself in the mess. I hot glued/safety pinned the plastic fake intestines I bought to the unitard. Then I proceeded to dry myself and the intestines I made for what seemed like way too many spooky jams and hot apple ciders later. I had to wear a huge, waterproof puffy coat over my ensemble [because Mother Nature shares my sentiments for slutty costumes, and made it snow in October], so I needed to make sure I wouldn't freeze my tits off or ruin my coat. Once everything was dry, I hand sewed the rest of the intestines onto the leotard, making sure to drape them ever so disgustingly.

Happy Halloween!

[more pictures/verbal gut spillage/a poem inspired by the Nightmare Before Christmas and sluts on my blog: nouveauvendimia.blogspot.com]