1. I love my new boots, I'm gonna die wearing them.
2. The green band on my wrist means I was in the Monster Pit at Lady Gaga. If I had worn these shoes there that's where I would have died wearing them.
3. Yesterday was my 21st birthday! If I had indeed died now I and become immortal I would have been forever 21 for realz (because you all see what I did there and it's never been done before). Anyway, I like 21, it's a good number. Awesomesauce.
I'm gonna stop talking about dying now, just know that those boots are really f**king amazing, and I'm wanna sleep with them in my bed, holding on to them, and wake up with scratches all over my face from the spikes. Yeah, totally.